I know once again that It has been a long time since I have posted on here. I have had some life adjustments in the past year. My oldest, Nanners, is now 15 and she has her temps. Yikes! She has been in soccer and track this past year. Mudd Princess, is now 12, she goes by sis more often than not. I stopped homeschooling her last year and she has been doing pretty good with everything. Fidget, well she is still a fidget. She has been in head start this year and loves it. She has grown up so much in the last year. Minnie me... well now we call her monkey butt, she even calls herself that now too. They are all great and still drive me crazy, but I would not change them for the world.
My marriage has just gone through a real rocky period. I will not go into that right now though, but, I do think people need to know that they way they think and feel about things is normal. We are trying so hard right now to save our marriage.
So I am back up and running, still doing daycare, but trying to find another job to do from home! wish me luck!

I feel like throwing in the towel. It's only 1:30 and I have already had a pretty crappy day. My hubby's unemployment check didn't come. I don't have all the rent money. Satellite company put hold on my checking account and now its overdrawn and they claim they can't do anything. Fidget's preschool bus was not running today, it was self transport, they called after I woke her and I couldn't take her. Didn't want to wake minnie me up to do that. I just feel like not doing absolutely anything. Oh hubbys work that he worked at for 4 days was supposed to pay him today. I don't have that either. I am just going to sulk and cry because at this moment If eel I deserve it.
I am the glue that holds this family together...I find every one's missing things or know right where they are even though I know I didn't have them. Why am I to remember all that? I am the one who washes every ones clothes when they need them. I am the one who goes searching in teenage daughters room for clothes at the last minute that you had told her to hang up a week ago. I budget the family household income. I plan the schedules. I play taxi and secretary. I deserve to cry when no one else is there to pick me up when i fall.
Sorry if this is depressing...I just needed to vent.
Oh and Have a Happy Thanksgivign Day tomorrow!

I was hit hard by some more reality this weekend. I have taken awhile to think about things. I am very upset with the situation that I am in. Obviously, I am the one who is going to have to get us out of it. My husband is looking for another job, but, in the meantime he is talking about going back to school for physical therapy. I know that I am supposed to support my husband in his adventures, but I honestly don't see this happening very well. My husband is not the "sharpest crayon in the box". I am not trying to put him down. I just don't see him doing very well and being happy with his decision.
My other issue is the fact that i would like to at least keep what we have. You know the essentials. The roof over my head, my van and heck, my cell phone is essential too. so is having the Internet at this point. I need that to make some extra cash, and I plan on starting online school myself in the next few weeks.
Anyhow, I get upset knowing that I can' get my children things that they are"wanting" for. Then I happen to look at what they do have and it is all taken for granted. Especially by Nanners. It must be the teen thing, I need to do and get her everything that she requests or she is very foul. Well, this is going to stop. She needs to earn her own things so she will be more responsible with the, she does purchase her own books and makes sure those are well taken care of..now she needs to move on to other things.
so we will be living in a basic house for awhile. Christmas will be small. I want my kids to realize what they have without having much. Wish me luck and give me any idea you may have over the next few weeks. It may help me help my kids come to grips with what they "need" and what they "want".

I know it once again has been awhile. I was going to have a great post this morning..now I am not so sure. My hubby has been laid off since March. It has been real nitty gritty here. so to speak. well things were looking really good as of 2 days ago. My hubby had an interview on Monday and started the job on Tuesday. Yeah!! I was so excited. Nanners was finally in a good mood too! She thought this would finally mean she could get out of the house and do some things. and it did. Unfortunately this excitement only lasted 4 days and 40 hours of work. The hubby called in to work this morning to find out about a car that needed parts and wasn't sure if they had come in yet or not. Well the phone call was a bad one. I guess their former employee who was out because of an injury was not happy that he was replaced and asked for his job back, they gave him his job back and now once again my hubby is with out a job! I am really beginning to lose hope in the world and in anything that we do.
Also this week I was stuck home with 3 sick kids while I was sick myself. Just in case you haven't had this experience...don't. I never want to have this or be with them like that again. I had bronchitis, Nanners had it too, and Mudd princess and so did Fidget!! It was so much fun, especially since I had to let the TV go because I could not pay that bill. Thanks though to our 2 DVD players and the movies we had. We watched a lot of them. All of us are feeling better now though, except little Minnie Me got sick tonight and is running a fever of 103. My poor baby! I am going to go to bed now, because I am sure I will be up with her in a little while taking care of her.
Just want to say thanks for letting me vent tonight!

long time....so sorry!!

I know that it has been awhile..a very long while. I am sorry to say. Maybe I wouldn't be so stressed if I had been blogging the last few months. I am, however, going to use this to vent and maybe see if I can even get some advice or even some tips on how to handle some situations.
My husband, just so you all know I do love him, has been laid off since March. I am a stay at home mom and a child care provider. His being at home has put a lot of rifts in our marriage.
I will just list the issues I am having problems with and if you can help...Please do so...
First, His unemployment was lowered...we are a family of 6.
2) He does not want to go back to work doing what he was doing....with the jobs today, how can one be picky???
3) He feels that he is worth more than a company will pay..even when it is more than unemployment.......Really?
4) He is constantly starting a project and not finishing it.
5) He has no idea about the bills, nor do I think he care....I just bounced a rent check to pay cash to keep my car insurance so it wouldn't cancel!!!
6) He yells at the kids to pick up their stuff all the time, but he always has stuff laying out!!! I won't say what I found on my end table..he is just lucky they were clean.
7) He wants to go to school to learn something new...I am all for that..just finish the application!!!

Sorry, but the last couple months at my house has not been a very good picnic. Ia m not saying that everything is his fault...I will own up to my share as well! I know that I am not home in the evenings very much. I have soccer for Nanners or 4h for her and mudd princess,. Those have been my times to veg and think about the situation at hand. I know that i can be easy on the girls and not follow through with discipline. I know I leave a mess too...(I figure I clean everything anyhow...)
So if anyone has any advice or tips on how to handle these issues...Please..Pleae do not hesitate to help!

Compalaints: I have a few

I know that I have not done this for a while but I think its time I start doing it more. This time is going to be a venting blog. I will update you on my family tomorrow.
First, I have been trying to sell my "Minnie me" clothes on an Internet site for awhile. the first time I guy had wanted them really bad and I sat and went through everything to make sure I had what he wanted. I put them in bags and labeled the bags. No call, no show. I called him the next day and he acted like he didn't even know who I was and then remembered and said he would be out the next day. Once again..no call no show! i called him once more to have his son answer and when he went to give the phone to his dad he told his son to tell me that he wasn't there. OK! these are just clothes. I am not a bill collector. I just wanted to know what more time I had to invest in this. I picked up my mess and put it together int he basement. Now I have someone else doing the same thing. Seriously!! I just need the money and want the room in my basement.!!
Second, EXES!! need I really say more. Mine hasn't paid child support in over a year! The only way i got anything from him was his taxes. Yet he wants me still to run one way anytime the kids want to see him. Honestly..he quit his job because he didn't like it and went to school while the rest of us are struggling to keep a job. He only calls when he wants to. The girls really don't want to have nothing to do with him. They feel guilty and go over there. He wants them to come to all these things he is having but never comes to there stuff because he can't afford to or whatever reason he comes up with. Seriously...if he cared he would be with them and help out somehow. I do it with unemployment and me babysitting.
Third, I really hate negative people! i have been on Prozac for years now and have found that I don't like myself. I have changed my meds and seem to be a better person for it. the problem lies when I am with people who constantly complain about everything. they have nothing nice to say. What really gets me is they talk so the person they are having an issue with can here them but will not talk to that person directly. If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all!!
I have some other gripes too but these are my top 3 at the moment. I do have a big gripe about my husband but even he won't listen to me about that. Why would anyone else?
On this note Have a good Day!

It has been awhile again since I have been on my blog. Maybe I should schedule a day each week and sit down and do it. That might happen better.
I am very confused about my 13 year old right now. Nanners has had a boyfriend. Yes I like him. He goes to a different school and I think that is what was making things difficult. She heard a few things and talked it over with him but decided she wanted to go away for a week and think some things out. Well he thought she broke up with him. So then she got mad at him because of this and did break up with him. She went away for the week. Mind you she isn't so innocent in all this either. She kinda likes someone else too. In this week she had a few friends and even her ex bothering her and really making life miserable. I don't know why a 13 year old boy would tell someone that his life just can't go on with out her. I think that is awful. And it made her feel awful. Needless to say they worked out a few things and decided to remain friends. This is great. Well of course "My space" plays a lot into this as well and I guess he already has a girlfriend by the time she came back. The same girl that nanners had heard something about before. I am so confused, don't know what to tell her. There are days when I am not even sure about my own relationship than to be giving her advice. I want to help. I am not sure HOW to help! I know she still cares very much for him and I know that they still talk. Maybe things will have a way of working out.
the other problem that I seem to be having with Nanners is her grades. she has never done so poorly before. I just don't know what other steps to take. She may have to repeat the 8th grade. She doesn't like me talking about her problems with people but i honestly need to get it off my chest before I burst.
Now i sit back in my chair and laugh hysterically I what I have just wrote. Thinking....pondering....realizing.....I still have 3 more girls to go through this with and it just the beginning!!!!!LOL What fun I have to look forward too. Remind me on mothers Day to tell my mom she is the greatest. I don't know how she did it!! My sister and I were a handful!